We hear about the moms needing time off from the kids, to relax, to regain some strength, to have fun with their friends… because it’s assumed moms spend the majority of the time with the kids, but even so, dads need a break too! Even if the dads take over on the weekends, like mine does, it’s still hard! It’s exhausting, emotionally, physically, mentally, and add that on top of the stresses of supporting a family, the job and all that other life stuff – it adds up!
Maybe men don’t talk about their feelings, their frustrations, their fears about their childrens’ futures. That doesn’t mean those feelings, fears and frustrations aren’t there. That doesn’t mean they aren’t taking a toll mentally, physically and emotionally, even spiritually. Men need emotional recharging as much as women. And men don’t usually get it from buying a new purse or getting a manicure.
In my house my spouse loves hunting. So every year he goes hunting with his buddies out in the woods somewhere in the middle of the mountains where there’s no buildings, no work, no electronics, no plumbing, and most importantly, no women or children. Whether he brings back and elk or a deer is secondary to the recharging he gets to be out in nature, hanging with his buds, being manly in hunting and providing food (insert a Tim Allen grunt) and just being away from it all. I used to think it was dumb, a waste of time, until he put it into language that I could understand – it was how he recharged. Now I’m all for it. I make sure nothing interferes with his hunting trips.
That’s his thing, hunting. Whatever your significant other’s “thing” is to recharge, support him in it. Maybe there will be a compromise in time spent, money, and maybe you’ll switch off weekends. Whatever. But you both need a break. You both need to recharge.
And don’t forget – you also need to build your relationship together as well. All these elements are important for surviving this challenging, exhausting life. But you can do it. Prioritize – and don’t put yourselves, or your relationship, last.
Keep it real.